(Also available from Starland mirror site)
Well, I've started the year off with a bang. I spent the day in bed yesterday with a bad cold. I'm still not up to speed but I needed to do this column and then I think I'm going back to bed. Hence, my comments will be very limited today because I'm not sure I'd make much sense! First, some comments from previous columns . . .
Nick Preston: Concerning the Captain Sulu series, I don't see why Paramount can't flip the bill for a trilogy of Captain Sulu TV movies. That's more realistic, and George Takei could pull it off. He's a dynamic actor, but the Sulu character has always been underwritten. I can't believe how they wasted him in "Flashback".
From Someone Identified Only as CaptainVin: As for the new series, I believe that if there is to be a new series then they need to get back to basics. Just another ship in the Federation. The more complex it gets the more limited the storylines will be. Like on Deep space nine, which I love and Voyerger which I like but not as much. And it should be in currunt timeline, not the past. I dont think it work in the past becuase you would know how maythings need to turn out and the tech stuff would be out of place. It would seem outdated. Or unrealastic if they didn't do it right and just imagine the nits then!!! I have several ideas in my head for a new show with characters and all. But I'm sure I'm not the only one.
Tom Bondurant: Just a couple of corollary items regarding Guild speculation on the fifth Star Trek series. First, because the preference is for a series set in the past, and one person mentioned the Robert April era, I mention Marvel Comics' excellent "Star Trek: Early Voyages," featuring Captain Pike and his crew. It's well worth your $1.99. Second, "Star Trek: The Next Generation -- The Continuing Mission," the new coffee-table book by the Reeves-Stevenses, ends with a hint that Rick Berman is at least strongly considering, and perhaps actively planning, the fifth series. It might not premiere immediately after the end of DS9, but low ratings apparently haven't discouraged Paramount. Thought you might like to know!
Daniel Tyman: As a humble servant fo the Dominion(an injoke), I felt I would put the entire discussion on Sisko and the Vorta to rest. Captain Sisko first encountered the Dominion(well, probably not, due to changelings) it was with Eris, a Vorta. But, she did not represent herself as one. In that episode, "The Jem'Hadar," she claimed to be a race persucuted by the Dominion(like the Dominion would ever do such a thing?). In the end, it ws revealed she was a member of the Dominion. Fast forward(50 minutes on my tape) to "The Search Part II." Here, we see, in a Dominion controlled 'dream', the Vorta posing as the Founders. Sisko says something to the affect of "So I have met the Founders before?" reffering to Eris. At the end, it was revealed that the Vorta are not the founders, and that was a ruse(sorry for spoiling it for ya'll). So, Eris was a Vorta, not a Founder.
Mike Cheyne: Very good idea, I say again. Now, to convince your publishers, this is my idea. Take them on the Internet. Go to Yahoo, Excite, Lycos, any search engine. Search for James Bond. You'll find about 100 web sites! And if you go to those sites, and tell those people you've come up with a James Bond Nitpicking Guide, they might even send you some nits! That's why a 007 Guide will work. Or better yet, just examine the box office stats when "Tomorrow Never Dies" hits America fully. Anyway, not to knock DS9 or Voyager, but weren't more people watching 007 on TBS than Trek. (I don't know)
Phil: Seven down, 19,993 to go . . .
Simon Crowley of Edmonton, Alberta: TBS is showing James Bond movies all week, and I'm rife w/ nits. (whispers: James Bond guide, James Bond guide...).
Phil: Eight down, 19,992 to go . . .
Reid Joiner: All this talk about the YoH Time Weapon-ship made me wonder.... It erases its target from history, right? Fine. But what does it consider a target? Allow me to expain:
I buy a handheld Time Weapon like the one on the ship, point it at my arch-nemesis, and fire. 'He' vanishes from time. But what constituted 'him'? Does the weapon erase his consciousness from time? Or does it erase every single molecule in his body from time? There's a big difference there. If it erased consciousness somehow, then he's just gone from time. But if the molecules are erased then, well, couldn't some really WIERD stuff happen?
Whaddya think, Phil?
Phil: At the moment, I'm not thinking much about anything but my impression was that the time machine created an alternate reality as if the target had never existed.
Paul Lalli of Feeding Hills, MA: Regarding the movie novelization's explanation of Kirk ordering 1/2 impulse in Spacedock during ST6, you said that it was probably the author's attempt to explain away a nit. I was always under the impression that the novelizations were based on the original screenplays -- which always contain much more material than the final product we see on screen. For instance, in ST6, I was always confused by the scene in which Uhura et al are trying to convince the Klingons at a listening post that they are in fact a Klingon transport. What in the world is "Don't catch any bugs" supposed to mean?! The novelization contains the information that the Klingons assumed the poorly-Klingon-speakers are smugglers, and don't care a whole lot. "Don't catch any bugs" was smuggler code for "have a safe trip" or something. The Klingons started laughing because they just informed the "smugglers" that they knew that they are smugglers. Now, if your theory is true, than the author of the novelization was simply explaining away the confusing scene. I find it incredibly difficult to believe that the way we see the scene on screen was the way the creators intended, because the ending of the scene simply does not make sense! Your thoughts?
Phil: Well . . . the first and only script that I have ever seen for one of the Trek movies was for Star Trek: Generations and my first impression was, "Where's the rest of it?!" From what I have seen of screen plays, they just don't contain that much information. There are scene descriptors (usually brief), dialogue descriptors (usually brief), and dialogue. The rough draft of Generation that I have is about 120 pages. It's double spaced, and mostly dialogue. And the dialogue occupies only a three or four inch column in the center of the page! ;-) Unless all the other scripts for the Trek movies are fundamentally different, I can't see how the screen plays would supply much to the novelizations! Movies are a director's medium, not a writer's medium. That's why, for me at least, novels are a superior story-telling vehicle. ;-)
Mike Deeds of Philadelphia, PA: I want to cast my vote against a Vol. II of the Classic Trek Guide. Although I am a fan of the original series, I just don't see what a second volume could possibly cover. After all, it seems that there will not be any more Classic Trek movies. The Vol. II of the Next Gen Guide was even an iffy purchase for me. I bought it for the new material (i.e. 7th season & Generations movie). I WILL buy these books:
DS9 Vol. II
Voyager Guide
The X-Files Vol. II
Xenite Guide (which I still think is a good idea despite what other
people think)
James Bond 007 Guide
Sequels/Movie Series Guide
Lisa Shock: In response to Simon de Vet's CD ROM idea, I'd really like to see something that. I've always wanted to see the "complete" file on each episode, and often thought that maybe one day you could get them published as giant-sized books (or a slim book per episode) but somehow I didn't think the publishers would go for it. A CD-ROM would be perfect! If you could get official sanction, you could have stills to illustrate some points. Actually, it might not be too hard for you to self-publish a CD-ROM and sell it directly to us!
Urac Sigma: I don't think the description of taking nothing but a pattern is strictly right for STAR TREK transporters. (In DOCTOR WHO it's another matter, where could make the case that you keep dying, but hardly anyone does.) I've read somewhere (the tech manual, I think), and possibly even heard that the transporter doesn't just *copy* you, it actually *turns you into* that pattern or data and beams *you*, not just information about a version of you from a few seconds ago, across. So...it's not *quote* so philosophically deep, perhaps.
From Someone Identified Only As Vader47000: It was always my understanding that transporters work on a quantum level, that is they break down the molecular structure of an individual, transport those molecules through a transporter beam, and then reconstruct them exactly. Thus the person doesn't actually die and become recreated with the same memories. There is an interesting scene in the novel "Federation" in which Zefram Cochrane poses the same question as Jonathon. Following the episode "Metamorphosis," a government agent from Cochrane's time (the novel was written before "First Contact" and thus has a widely differing, yet more logical, look at the time period) has managed through different means to survive and has convinced Klingon agents to kidnap Cochrane in order to find the secret of the "Warp Bomb." Well, Kirk goes to rescue him, and Cochrane is beamed aboard the Enterprise. He wonders about the workings of the strange device, and immediately labels it as bad, that it kills the individual and creates an exact duplicate of them. The transporter technician, quoting the TNG Technical Manual, tells him of the Quantum Resolution hypothesis.
However the events in "Our Man Bashir" seem to indicate that only the neural capacities of a person, ie their conciousness (or soul) need be stored at the Quantum level. Thus the body can be torn apart and recreated, and therefore the individual would in this sense NOT be original, but his conciousness would be. So what defines the individual? The mind, the body? I'd argue the mind myself, that the body is secondary.
By the way, the novel "Federation" also features Cochrane meeting Picard and crew as he is sent through a quantum singularity into the future. It also tries to explain away the nit of why the 23rd century of Kirk's TOS era seems out of date to us in the 1990s: WWIII caused a dark age and humanity became more conservative and women decided to hold back and wear really short skirts in the military.
From Someone Identified Only as CaptainVin: I understand that Riker gets his own ship by the end of Star Trek 9. That is not for sure though. I'm part of a mailing list for the new movie so I get some tidbits.
Daniel Tyman: The writers were so impressed with Jeff Combs' performance in dailies, they wanted him to be a regular. But, killing Weyoun worked. So, they decided to have the Dominion clone. The fifth Weyoun came back in "Ties of Blood and Water." In case you were wondering, Weyoun's first appearance, were he was killed by First Omet'iklan, was in the episode "To the Death."
Joshua Truax: The TNG episode "Preemptive Strike" was indeed originally titled "The Good Fight". There are several sources that bear this out. One of them (I forget which one) explained that the creators changed the title because "The Good Fight" too closely resembled the title of the episode following it, which of course was "All Good Things..."
On to the questions . . .
Rene Charbonneau: What do you think happened to the Dominion ships that entered into the wormhole in "Sacrifice Of Angels"? I know the Prophets got rid of them, but what did they do to them? Were they destroyed or transported back to the Gamma Quadrant?
Phil: Only the creators know for sure!
Charles Tyson of Burlingame, CA: Has anyone ever pointed out that McCoy muffs a line in the epilogue of "Mudd's Women"? I haven't seen the episode in a long time, but it goes pretty much like this:
McCoy and Kirk are on the bridge of the Enterprise. McCoy is complimenting Kirk on his brilliant strategem of making a woman beautiful using no artificial ingredients, suggesting that Kirk would have been a success in fields other than starship captaining. He says--
"Have you ever tried considering patent medicine?"
Which doesn't make sense if you think about it. Clearly he's supposed to say "Have you ever considered trying patent medicine?" I think there's a tiny flicker in McCoy's eyes as he realizes he's garbling the line, but Kirk doesn't miss a beat and the scene rolls on to its conclusion.
Phil: First I've heard of it but it sounds like a nit to me!
Tracey Rennie of Caledon, Ontario: I am a huge fan of the X-Files and a 'shipper to boot. I recently had the pleasure of reading your new book "The Nitpicker's Guide for X-Philes". I enjoyed all the humorous nits that you've come up with.
The X-Files is currently in Season Five which we have, so far, enjoyed immensely due to episodes like Redux 2, Detour and the end of Post-Modern Prometheus (you know all the 'shippy episodes). However, my sister and I have thought up a frightening prediction that we would dread: We fear that Chris Carter may be setting Mulder and Scully up to be brother and sister! (Scully has red hair, so does Samantha Mulder; Scully was born exactly one week and one day previous to when Samantha was born; There are rumors that Bill Scully was going to turn out to be involved with 'the conspiracy' which could mean that Scully has been a victim of false family memories implanted by the government...and Bill Scully. These are the main reasons that jump started our terror, but there may be more).
What we ask of you is to simply reassure us that we are way "out there" in our awful predictions and perhaps you could inform us on what you think will happen. Thanks for taking the time to read my letter. As a true die-hard X-Phile it is much appreciated. I look forward to reading your next book on the X-Files.
Phil: Thanks for th kind words about the Guide! Always nice to know that fans are enjoying the work. Obviously, I have no control or inkling of what the creators might do with regards to the relationship between Mulder and Scully. However, there is an interesting parallel in all of this: The Star Wars Tie-In.
You might recall that the creators have strongly hinted that Cancerman is Mulder's father. For a more complete discussion, see page 290 of the X-Phile Guide. In that discussion, I alluded to the Star Wars Tie-In, "Luke, Luke . . . I am your father." (And yes, I know that Vader didn't say, "Luke"!)
It occurs to me that Mulder and Scully as siblings would be another Star Wars Tie-In. Remember Luke and Leia?
Dan Wiese, El Cajon: I was watching this thing on T.V. where Patrick Stewart was speaking; at one point he made a reference to one time the Enterprise crew encounted or attacked or fought(can't really recall) a grain of rice. The only episode this even vaugely remieneds me of is "Home Soil", but I'm not sure that's the episode he was refering to. This has been bugging me for a while. Do you have any idea of other episodes he might have been refering to?
Phil: "Home Soil" would be my guess! Remember that we're talking about actors here. I'm actually amazed that he can remember that much about the episode! ;-)
Edward J: I know I'm out of date, but do you think there will ever be any movies or shows with the original cast?
Phil: Doubtful from what I've heard.
Joseph Lin: Two things really bother me in Star Trek. Whenever I watch an episode of classic Star Trek I might see a computer with blinking lights, but without a monitor or anythng with words on it. Then the character might read a biography of a person or a some scanner data. My problem with this is, does the Enterprise use different colored blinking lights as their language? Everyone aboard the Enterprise came from Earth(except for Spock) so there should be no reason for different colored lights as their language. Also, sometimes information in the classic series is passed through colored pieces of what looks like a very thin, small and rectanglular piece of wood. Those 'pieces of colored wood' have absolutely no writing on it, yet in the classic episode "Obsession" McCoy reads a deatiled title off of it just by looking at its yellowish color!!! In the 23rd century, does the shade of a color represent the title of certain things? Or perhaps the title of things are now camoflauged so only certian people could see them. Sometimes in ST:TNG or VOYAGER, I might see a tricorder with blinking lights and NO WRITING on it while a person reads something off of it.
Phil: I agree! It's amazing!
James D. Meader: Something that I have been wondering about for some time now. Starfleet vessels are incredibly powerful, capable of traveling at many multiples of the speed of light. Have you noticed tho that battles seem to always happen at impulse? Not only that, but ships in a fight always seem to get right up in each others face and slug it out at incredibly close range. Seems to me that better tactics might be fast hit-and-run engagements. Maybe it is a contingency plan that if a ship sustains too much damage, that any available personnel go to the nearest windows and start blazing away at attackers with hand phasers! If things get REALLY bad, then they could always resort to chucking rocks! I know, I know.... production problems and the necessity of keeping things within the constricting field of the TV screen probably make this necessary.
Phil: The only battle I can think of that occurred at warp was in "Elaan of Troyius" and it seemed to be pretty successful.
Nathan Chastain: Your frequent statements that you are running late or short on time, remind me of a nurse I worked with eons ago. She was new and thus was slow at completing her work. She was constantly saying. "I'm running behind." "I'm running behind." A nurse's aide asked her is that your Indian name? Although I don't recall you using that phrase, I believe it should become your new title Chief Running Behind.
Has a tote board listing open ended episodes from each Trek series been created? Has a tote board listing open ended episodes of the X-files been create? Has a tote board that lists the number of crewmen who have died under the command of each captain? This tote board would probably have a section on the number of crewmen have died under the command of each boarding party/away team leader.
Phil: The new title sounds about right to me! As for the toteboards: None of the above! ;-)
Gina Torgersen of LaCrosse FL: If antitime is just time going backwards, did normal time turn into antitime in "Timescape?" What exactly is a temporal causality paradox? And if there are antitime and antimatter, is there antispace? And if so, antispace can't just be space that holds antimatter because normal space can hold antimatter too.
Phil: I think I'll leave this to the Guild. I'm running on empty.
Adam Howarter: I was watching this weeks ep of Voyager (don't remember the name) and think I found a nit. At the end of the ep the doc and Torres have returned and are talking to Paris in sick bay. As the show ends the doc walks into his office and puts his feet up on the desk. And there on the desk is a thermos (like we'd use to carry coffee in.) Thats odd I thought. The doc doesn't drink. And if Paris had wanted something couldn't he have just walked over to the replicator? Any ideas great one?
Phil: No doubt, he's simply trying to appear more human.
Harvey Kitzman: I have some misc. nits from some recently viewed episodes and would appreciate some input form The Chief.
Genesis (TNG): Data mentions that Nurse Ogawa'a DNA is in a state or "ribosciatic flux". I have my Ph.D. in biochemistry and have never heard of this term. You mention some other scientifically trained Nitpickers in Volume 2 of the TNG Guide. Did anyone else mention this term?
Journey's End (TNG): I think I read somewhere that Chakotay came from Dorvan 5. Is this correct?
Firstborn (TNG): 1. What happened to Kurn's family? K'Mtar tells Alexander that he has cousins that would like to meet him. I find it hard to believe that Worf would not come up with a plan that involves all of Kurn's family when he had Dr. Bashir change Kurn into Rodek (The Sons of Mogh - DS9). 2. K'Mtar tells Worf to look into his heart about what to do with Alexander. Don't Klingons have 2 hearts? (I know, this could just be an expression). 3. What happened to Lursa's son? Did he die in Generations or did he survive as a loose plot end for future episodes? For that matter, why didn't the Enterprise arrest Lursa and B'Etor since they were fugitives from the Klingon Empire? 4. My wife asked me this one. What did Worf do when he was approaching the age to become a warrior? Who taught him (was it self taught)? Where did he go for these rituals? Please let me know.
Phil: I leave it to you, fellow members of the Guild! My neurons are shutting down. ;-)
Murray Leeder: Say, Phil, who is it that writes those blurbs on the back of the guides? I was very amused by the mention of "hyperspace" on the back of the DS9 Guide!
Phil: They are written by someone at Dell. Not really sure who!
Have a great weekend, everybody! Happy New Year!
If you would like to submit a question or comment, send it to: chief@nitcentral.com with "Question" in the Subject line. (Remember the legalese: Everything you submit becomes mine and you grant me the right to use your name in any future publication by me.)
Copyright 1998 by Phil Farrand. All rights reserved.